Lost
by 3.14159 26535 89793 23846 2643
Summary: My take on what happens to Chloe the night she leaves with Evan and beyond. With all of the revelations and lies , she ends up feeling lost and scared. Who can she trust? TW for self harm , suicide, mental health issues. Can Ange save her?
1. Lost Chapter 1

**Hi, I'm really into the Chloe storyline at the moment and this is just something I couldn't get out of my head. I hope you like it.**

Everything is spinning, like being on a fairground ride in her own head. Putting her hands down to her side to grab hold of anything that might offer stability is completely in vain and the nausea inducing turmoil continues.

Opening her eyes a little she finds she is in complete darkness, apart from a slight light coming from another room, the door open at an angle of about 25 degrees. Engaging her other senses she can hear a buzzing, similar in sound to an extractor fan. Even in her inebriated state she can deduce she must be in some sort of hotel room.

There wasn't much time for more thinking however as her instincts kicked in , feeling the distinctive pain in her abdomen and bile rising in her throat, she knew she needed to get to the bathroom fast. Jumping up quickly, she hoped to make it to the bathroom on time. However, she realised her body wasn't quite under her control as she fell to her knees just as fast as she had jumped up, scraping them against the cheap carpet.

Proceeding to crawl to the bathroom, she had to close her eyes to the harsh artificial light, feeling her way to the toilet instead- lifting the lid - she vomited repeatedly and painfully, the burning of alcohol mixed with that of bile in her throat causing her eyes to water and her to shudder in disgust.

After what felt like hours, the retching stopped and she was able to sit back and look around. Still feeling very much inebriated she concluded she must be incredibly drunk, and did indeed appear to be in a hotel bathroom, taking in the sight of the complimentary toiletries.

"What the?" she mumbles to herself, slowly getting to her feet and stumbling out of the bathroom- before pawing at the wall in darkness in search of a light switch. Eventually feeling one under her fingers she managed to switch it on, revealing a budget chain hotel room to her squinting eyes.

The sheets on the bed were ruffled from where she had been laid on them, mascara stains all over the pillow, as though from tears- confused, she saw what she recognised as her bag on the floor next to the bed, and she slowly went over to it- knelt down unsteadily and clumsily rummaged through it looking for any sign of where she was and why. Alarmed at having no recollection of what had preceded this moment she was relieved to spot her phone.

After numerous failed attempts to unlock it with her lack of hand-eye coordination she finally did to see 67 missed calls. 60 from her Mum and 7 from Evan.

Of course. Her Mum. The news. The pain. Feeling the bile rise again she staggered back to the now familiar toilet , her hand over her mouth. Dropping down to her sore knees she attempted to get her hair out of the way. There was nothing to bring up however, leaving her dry heaving so hard she wondered if she was going to tear something.

_You stupid girl_._What have you done? _

Chloe looked around for the source of the voice, quickly realising she was very much alone.

"No no no no not again" she muttered ,

holding her head and starting to sob.

_I told you. You should never trust her.__I was right.__It was all a lie.__Your whole life.__She doesn't even love you._

Feeling her breathing starting to become fast and sharp, she felt an overwhelming feeling of fear and dread deep inside her chest . Reaching out to grab onto anything that could offer any comfort ,she found nothing but thin air, her panic increasing even further. She felt more alone than ever.

She was aware of the tickle of tears on her cheeks as she desperately fought for breath. Wrapping herself in her own arms as tight as she could and beggining to rock, she sought for but could not find any kind of comfort.

_You're going to die.__Nobody will care._

The voice continued, she shook her head trying to get it out of there, pulling at her own hair in terror. She felt dizzy and could see dark spots, like she was drifting out of conciousness. Her ears were ringing and her head pounding.

After a few minutes her breathing started to even out -though the fear was still very much there.

Exhausted and confused she wanted her Mum.

"Mummy" she whispered, sounding like a 5 year old.

_She doesn't care.__She's probably with your brother._

She stood up shakily , seeing herself in the mirror- she realised she was deeply ashamed at what she saw- she was a mess. Her face was pale and blotchy , makeup tracks running down it, mixing in with her endless stream of tears. She could see what looked like a bruise developing under her chin.She looked as she felt, weak.

She kept wondering.What was she doing? What was happening? Was she mad?

_Who would want you? The voice taunted , laughing._

Feeling pure hatred ,anger and frustration she hit out at her reflection.

The voice within her laughed manically.

The mirror shattered . Pain ,she could feel that. Looking down at her hand she saw blood. Never good with the sight of her own blood, ironically with her previous struggles, she felt ill. Exhausted and inebriated she felt her knees give way and her body fall to the ground with a thud. Losing awareness and the ability to move, all she was aware of was pain- emotional and physical.

She briefly thought about how this was all she was ever going to feel from now on, as her eyes began to flicker shut, she stopped fighting and let the darkness take her.

**Reviews appreciated, thank you!**


	2. Lost 2

Waking with a start, Chloe raised her head and surveyed her surroundings, the discomfort in her back and neck was explained by the fact that she found herself on the hard tiled floor of the bathroom.

Groaning, she held her head- she had what felt like the world's worst hangover. She hurt everywhere. Trying to push herself up she gasped in pain as she felt something sharp cut her hand, looking closer she found that she was laid in a pool of broken mirror, the harsh artificial light of the bathroom reflecting menacingly in the shards. Looking down at her hand she saw the culprit of the pain- a small shard was embedded in the heel of her right hand . There was also dried blood and on further inspection she saw numerous cuts on both hands, luckily none of them particularly deep.

After a few moments of preparing herself she pulled the shard out, quickly holding a towel to try to stop the bleeding, grimacing in pain. The bleeding stopped after a few moments, which she was very relieved about as she was starting to feel dizzy.

With great caution she brushed away the debris with her socked foot and back of her good hand so that she could clamber to her feet. She sat down on the toilet as she felt too weak to walk, and took in the scene before her- dried blood and shattered mirror littered the floor.

Rubbing her eyes Chloe wished away her headache but with no luck, and wondered exactly how much she had to drink the night before. She'd had her fair share of wild nights but this was something else.

She felt a pang of hurt as she remembered the day before, realising it was not a nightmare, she wondered how she could face her Mum at work.

"Crap" she muttered to herself as she thought of work. What time was it? Where was she even?

Stepping carefully through the bathroom she made her way to her phone which was laid on the bed.

It said 9:14 am. Also she noticed 83 missed calls from her Mum . She wasn't sure if she felt guilty for ignoring her or angry that she wouldn't leave her alone.

Groaning once again she realised she was due to be at work at 10, working on the YAU with none other than her whole immediate family.

Picking up what she could of the mirror, she laid a towel down on the floor to avoid stepping on any tiny remnants and put the shower on, turning the temperature to almost as hot as it would go.

Grabbing the miniature bottles of shampoo and body wash she climbed into the shower and let the hot water run down her body. After washing her hair and scrubbing herself carefully with the shower gel she was beginning to feel more human. Her head was still pounding and there was an underlying feeling of nausea, a quick inspection of her body also revealed a few more injuries in addition to the cuts on her hand- she had friction burns on her knees, bruised wrists and she noticed her chin felt a little sore though without a mirror she couldn't really examine why. Luckily all injuries appeared superficial, surprising really as she had been laid in broken glass for however long.

She thought long and hard about what she had been up to last night, but beyond getting into the car with Evan she was incredibly patchy. She thought she might remember punching the mirror at some point, which was further supported by her injuries.

Swallowing her embarrassment she climbed out of the shower and wrapped herself into a big fluffy towel, towel drying her hair and body, being careful not to reopen any of her cuts. Looking at her phone she realised it was now 9:45am, she quickly climbed into her dirty clothes, applied deodorant from within her handbag and brushed her hair with her miniature hair brush- chewing a peice of chewing gum as she had no toothpaste.

There was no time to apply makeup or do anything other than scrape her hair back into a damp ponytail. Luckily as there was definitely no time to go home she remembered she had spare stuff at work , and she could just step into scrubs straight away anyway.

Seeing it was not 9:57am she knew she would be late, but was eager to get to work as soon as possible- wanting to keep her routine the same and find comfort in her work, especially since everything else she knew to be true had turned out not to be. She didn't like letting on she was struggling, always wanting to appear calm and confident.

Putting her bag on, she looked out of the window and was relieved to see she recognised where she was, and better still it was only a 20 minute or something walk to work.

Maybe nobody would even notice she was late , she thought as she hurriedly left the room, feeling a pang of guilt for the mess she had left behind but assuming she would just be charged . Not that she even knew if she had been in any state to leave her correct details when getting the room.

Please review! Thank you.


	3. Lost Chapter 3

The automatic doors opened as she approached, and Chloe felt a peak of her anxiety, at almost half an hour late she knew she would have some explaining to do, something she really wasn't in the mood for. She briefly wondered how she had managed to get even this far, briefly contemplating whether she was still under the influence of alcohol- it had always made her braver, and more stupid, she thought to herself.

Keeping her head down and heading for the lift she felt as though hundreds of pairs of eyes were on her, judging her every move. A quick glance upward revealed that in fact most people were going about their daily business, oblivious even to her presence.

However she did meet one pair of familiar eyes, that were scrutinising her closely. The steely gaze of none other than Jac Naylor was on her. Her expression was inquisitive, as the stood impatiently in the queue for her morning coffee . Chloe quickly dropped the eye contact and rushed into the lift, the doors of which had just opened at the right moment.

Thankful as the doors closed and she found herself alone, she pressed the button with her shaking hand, leaning back and taking a deep breath- willing herself to calm down, trying to focus on the sensation of going up in the lift.

Still confused by the absurdity of the situation she had found herself in, she waited for the doors to open for what felt like hours, willing herself to get sorted out.

It's just another day, she thought to herself over and over again.

Before she was ready, the doors started to open ,not that she would have ever felt ready to tackle this situation.

Quickly she set off towards the locker room, head down and hoping she would be invisible. Just wanting to get into her scrubs and do something that came naturally to her, being a doctor. Even with everything else that had happened, she still had that.

"Chloe" Ange shouted urgently, running after her daughter. She had been so worried, and the only reason she was even at work was because of the chance that Chloe might show up. Not even on shift, she had told the few people that had asked why she was there that she had some paperwork to catch up on.

She had been waiting for what felt like forever, terrified when Chloe hadn't turned up for her shift.

"Chloe" she shouted again, watching as Chloe quickly walked into the locker room, slamming the door shut behind her.

Leaning against the door , Chloe struggled to control herself. She felt the door being pushed but remaining strong enough not to let it open.

Not wanting to cause a fuss, Ange didn't push the door any further.

"Chloe" she said calmly.

"Let me in". Both Chloe and Ange knew this was referring to more than just opening the door.

Just wanting to get the inevitable out of the way, Chloe moved from the door and sat down on the bench , she was going to have to face her sometime.

Hearing movement inside, Ange tried the door again and was relieved to find it would open.

Seeing her daughter sat with her head in her hands, her heart broke.

"Sweetheart, I was so worried" she said, going over and sitting down next to her, her bright blue eyes staring at her beautiful daughter.

"Why? There's nothing to worry about. You lied to me my whole life, it's not like that is a problem, is it?" Chloe said viciously, not even looking up.

Not rising to the comment Ange stayed quiet and instead surveyed her daughter's appearance, noticing she was in the same clothes as last night, smelled slightly of stale alcohol and that her clothes were stained with a small amount of dark brown. Looking closer at her daughter's jeans she realised that this was most likely blood. Panicking she was scared that Chloe might have hurt herself.

"Chloe, what happened? Is that blood, are you hurt? Let me see." She said desperately, laying a gentle hand on Chloe's thigh.

Flinching in response, Chloe stood up, the anger evident in her eyes. That wasn't the only thing that her face revealed to Ange. She was pale, far more so than normal with dark rings around her eyes- it was breaking Ange to see her daughter in such a state. Ange gasped when she saw the beginnings of a bruise on her delicate chin.

Standing up in order to approach her daughter and get closer look at her face. Chloe responded by backing away, her hands out as if to ward everyone away.

"Get away, don't look at me, please don't look at me" Chloe begged.

"Why? Sweetheart, please" Ange said kindly.

"I hate what you must see when you look at me, I hate what I am to you."

Wishing her Mum would just back off and leave her alone, Chloe could feel her anxiety increasing. That wasn't the worst of it , she felt strange, weak- not like she did during a panic attack, this was different.

"Chlo" Ange said, seeing her daughter appear unfocused and dizzy. Noticing her head starting to fall backwards, Ange stepped forward to grab her.

Dark spots and a ringing in her ears were all Chloe was aware of, feeling herself become increasingly distant from reality.

Just as she thought her knees might give way, she felt strong arms wrap around her , holding her up.

"Mmmm" was all she could say.

"Chloe, bend you knees, bend your knees Chloe, come on bend your knees" her Mum said, struggling to hold all of her weight against her.

Slowly and clumsily Chloe followed this instruction, and Ange lowered her to the floor as gently as she could. Getting her knelt on the floor, Ange then carefully helped her down so that she was laid on her side.

Within seconds Chloe could feel the ringing in her ears start to dissipate and her vision improved.

"Can you hear me?" Ange said loudly, shaking Chloe gently by her shoulder- concern evident in her voice.

"Of course" Chloe replied, attempting to sound annoyed but sounding weaker than she would have liked. Feeling frustrated and agitated, she tried to push herself into a seated position but found strong arms pushing her back down.

"No, stay down, you almost passed out, stay there. I'm going to get help" Ange said, authority in her voice.

"No please" Chloe begged, grabbing hold of her Mums scrub top.

"I don't want people prying into my private business" she said.

After a moment of consideration, Ange decided to compromise.

"Ok, but you have to let me check you over"

Chloe went to argue but realised that this was the best it was going to get. Feeling a little scared by her episode, she would never admit it, but she did find her Mum comforting.

"Fine"

"Right, well we will have to go somewhere more private" Ange said, acutely aware that the door could open at any moment and wanting to get a look at what had caused the blood stains on her jeans- meaning she would be required to get into at least some level of undress. She was also desperate to respect her daughters desire for privacy.

"Do you feel ready to sit up?"

"Yeah" she said struggling to push herself up, which she achieved with a little help.

"Feeling alright?" her Mum asked, her gaze still intently set on her daughter.

Giving her a moment Ange then helped her to stand, and after a wobbly moment where she had to cling onto her Mum, she was upright and steady.

"Right, nice and easy, I'm going to take you to the on call room , it's not far- tell me if you need to stop." She said calmly.

Nodding, Chloe took a deep breath, still not feeling right- she was absolutely exhausted, her hangover had really developed now, and she was hurting all over. She contemplated for a moment, and decided this was definitely the most tired she had ever felt.

Slowly Ange walked Chloe to the on call room, luckily not seeing anyone. It was a very quiet day on the wards . Ange was relieved as they saw the on call room door as she could feel Chloe was beginning to lean on her more and more.

Struggling to open the door and hold her daughter at the same time, she pushed the door open and walked Chloe towards the bed, where she sat her down, before closing and locking the door.

Looking back at her daughter, sat forlornly on the bed, looking like a small child Ange felt a surge of anger. She knew Chloe wouldn't react well, and this was even worse than she had anticipated. She should have got them both out of Holby the second this kicked off. Her job as a mother was to protect her, something she had evidently failed to do.

Walking over towards her, Ange knelt in from of her in order to look into her eyes, taking her hands into her own she noticed a number of cuts, which would explain the blood on her sleeves.

"What the hell happened Chlo?" Ange said with a sigh, turning her hands over to examine them.

"Don't know"

" Where were you last night?"

"Don't know"

"Did you do this to yourself sweetheart?"

"Don't know"

"Right" Ange sighed knowing she wasn't going to get any answers, not knowing if she was being deliberately awkward or really didn't know.

"Let's get you sorted, you need to take your jeans off so I can see". Chloe didn't react.

"If you want me to call someone else in I can do"

"No" Chloe said, undoing the button of her jeans and clumsily pulling them down, wincing as she pulled then down from her knees, as scabs had started to form and fused to the material.

"Right, they don't look too deep, you just stay here and I will go and get some supplies"

Dashing out of the on call room, leaving a 'do not disturb' sign on, she quickly went to the nearest supply trolley and got what she needed to clean and dress the wounds. Thinking quickly, she nipped into the locker room-getting a change of clothes for Chloe and her bag.

Briefly looking around to check there was nobody watching, she darted back inside the on call room, supplies hidden amongst the clothes.

She was almost expecting Chloe to be gone, but instead she was fast asleep.

She must have been exhausted Ange thought, going over and putting her into a more comfortable position, she hardly stirred , evidently in a deep sleep.

Stroking her hair back from her face just as she did when Chloe was a little girl, Ange watched her sleep.

"Just try repair work now, sweetheart, we are going to get through this. I promise." She whispered.

Starting by cleaning the cuts on her hands, and then moving onto her knees, Ange was relieved to see they were superficial, though must definitely be sore. They didn't look like they were self inflicted, but she couldn't be sure. Gently she dressed the wounds on her legs before delicately tilting her daughter's face so she could look more closely at the bruise she had noticed forming on her chin.

Looking painful, and especially prominent against her face, that remained drained of colour, Ange wondered how it had happened. It looked almost as though she had been hit, she thought angrily. If anyone hurt her daughter she would destroy them. Feeling a pang of pain as she thought of how she was largely responsible for her daughter's suffering at present, she started to tuck her under the covers, kissing her forehead.

Sitting in the chair she decided to think from a doctors point of view, the cuts and abrasions were nothing to worry about now that had been cleaned, though she was thinking the main issue at the point was exhaustion , dehydration and heartbreak.

Thinking how best to help her get better, she resolved to let her daughter rest, she was looking so peaceful and innocent. The heartbreak would take time to resolve, she knew she could help Chloe, the hard part was getting her to help herself. The dehydration was something she would have to sort, getting up to get the supplies to set her up to a drip, there was no way she was going to fight to get Chloe to drink, she looked so calm and she didn't want to disrupt that.

Grabbing a bar of Chloe's favourite chocolate from the vending machine , as well as the supplies she needed, she started to think more about what Chloe must have been up to the night before.

The last thing she saw of her was getting into the car with Evan. Evan, where is he? She thought. Usually he was by Chloe's side at all times. Maybe he would know what happened. Quickly putting a call in to get some cover for Chloe, who was due to be working closely with a YAU case today- she turned her attention back to her daughter.

Getting back to her as fast as she could , she nodded and exchanged pleasantries with a few people, eager not to bring any attention to herself, and within minutes she was back at her daughter's bedside.

With Chloe still sleeping, Ange grimaced as she got Chloe hooked up to the drip, hating breaking her pale and delicate skin with the needle, but knowing it was best. Chloe did stir slightly during this, and started squirming.

"Mum?" she said ,her eyes not opening.

"I'm here darling" Ange said, stroking her cheek, leaning over her.

"Sorry" Chloe said groggily.

"Why?" Ange asked, very concerned now.

" For existing" Chloe replied, matter of factly. Like it was the most normal thing in the world to say.

"Don't be silly, you are the best thing in my life" Ange said, tears welling up in her eyes.

Realising that Chloe was half asleep , she asked "What happened last night?"

"Don't know Mummy, I can't remember" Chloe said , groggily.

"Do you want me to get Evan for you?"

"No"

"Why?" Ange asked, wanting answers .

"Not nice" Chloe mumbled

"What do you mean?" she asked, getting only a gentle snore in response.

**Please review and let me know what you think!**


	4. Lost chapter 4

4 hours passed, and Chloe remained asleep for the duration. Ange, concerned that her daughter would wake up alone, had sat in the chair next to the bed, watching her closely the whole time.

Falling into a light sleep herself, tired from being up all night, Ange was disturbed by the sound of movement, and woke up to see Chloe thrashing about , sweat pouring from her forehead and murmuring incoherently.

"Chloe!" Ange said, jumping up and to her daughter's side in seconds, holding her by the arms- she quickly realised that Chloe must be having a nightmare.

"Chloe, it's alright shhhh, shhhh it's alright darling" she said, gently shaking Chloe, who was tensed up almost as though she was paralysed in fear.

"Chloe, please" she begged, trying to hold her daughter still, as she began thrashing around again.

With a start Chloe's eyes opened, and she sat up suddenly, clearly not aware of her surroundings.

"Mummy's here, you're safe" Ange whispered, sitting on the bed and pulling Chloe towards her, holding her tightly to her chest .

Chloe continued to breath erratically , in between muffled sobs.

"Shhhh shhhh" Ange said, rocking her back and forth.

"It was just a bad dream, you're here with me, you are fine". Ange said soothingly.

Sensing Chloe start to relax slightly as though she was gaining more awareness of where she was, Ange pulled away slightly in order to see Chloe's face, she gently wiped away the tears that were running down her face with her thumb.

Pulling her back into her embrace they sat there for a few minutes silently- the only noise that could be heard was the gentle creaking of the cheap bed as Ange continued to rock Chloe.

After her breathing had all but returned to normal , she asked "Are you alright, Chlo?"

Receiving no response at all she tried again. "Chloe?"

Still not getting as much as a murmur, Ange moved to kneel next to the bed, both hands on Chloe's shoulders. Their faces barely centimetres apart, Ange spoke softly.

"Sweetheart, its fine, I'm here. Can you hear me?" Ange said, her voice laced with worry- she was worried by how Chloe seemed almost to be in a trance like state.

She received a small nod from her daughter, but no eye contact. Chloe looked completely devoid of emotion, her face displaying a neutral expression, as though her mind was somewhere else.

Deciding to give her a few moments, Ange sat back down in the chair and silently watched Chloe.

After around 10 minutes, Chloe's eyes looked up and into her mother's.

"Are you alright ?" Ange asked.

"Yes" came the reply, though neither of them believed it.

"What was the nightmare about?" Ange questioned, concerned.

"Nothing" she dismissed.

"We both know it was not nothing" Ange said, patiently.

"It was just a stupid nightmare, leave it" Chloe snapped.

"I'm scared and worried Chloe, you need to talk to me" Ange said with a sigh.

"You're scared? How do you think I feel? Everything I had is gone. Everything that was truth is now a lie. I don't know who to trust anymore, I can't even trust myself" Chloe replied, venom in her voice.

Hurt deeply by her daughter's words, but relieved that she was talking to her, Ange countered. " I know it feels like that Chlo , but you have me, and I love you. I hope one day you will understand what I did, and realise how much I love you. I know this hurts, I'm hurting too- but I know we can get through this".

Desperately wanting to believe her Mums words, but not allowing herself, she just shrugged- as though she didn't care, when she did - more than anything.

"I'm done" Chloe said quietly.

"What do you mean?"

"I'm just, done" Chloe answered, shaking her head as if in disbelief.

"In what way?" Ange asked, worried.

"Caring, Feeling. Trying" she said, as though she had given up.

"Please don't say that sweetheart, why?" Ange practically begged.

" I don't even know what's real anymore, I've gone crazy"

"No, you haven't, it's normal after a big shock like this" Ange comforted.

"It's not normal to forget a whole day, is it?" Chloe snapped back.

"What do you mean?"

"You keep asking me where I was last night. I woke up in a hotel room, laid in broken glass and blood Mum. I have no idea how I got there. I remember leaving with Evan, and then waking up. What was I doing? Do you get it now? Crazy. Crazy. Crazy." Chloe said starting to hit her head with frustration.

Silently grabbing her arms to stop her from hitting herself again and, kneeling back down in front of the bed, Ange just stared into her daughter's eyes, her own starting to well up.

"You are not crazy" she said calmly ."You were definitely drinking last night, you probably just passed out drunk."

"Drunk" Chloe repeated as though it had promoted something.

Rubbing her eyes as she tried desperately to remember, she could just see Evans angry face, she could hear his voice. He was yelling at her for getting drunk.

Something about her lying to him, going out without him, talking with other people.

No wonder he was keeping his distance.

Now even he doesn't want me, she thought.

**Please review and let me know what you think!**


	5. Lost Chapter 5

"Well? What is it?"

"Nothing, you're right. Maybe I did have too much to drink" she said, trying to get her Mum to give her space, holding her head in pain.

"Are you alright?" Ange asked , worried.

Nodding her head, Chloe then put her hand over her mouth, her nausea returning strongly.

Realising what this meant, Ange quickly picked up the bin and held it in front of Chloe just in time. As Chloe vomited painfully into the bin, Ange did her best to keep her hair back for her.

"Finished?"

Chloe nodded meekly, gratefully accepting the tissue offered to her by her Mum and wiping her mouth.

Sighing , Chloe could not believe the mess she had gotten herself into. She had now ended up trapped in a room with the one person she wanted to avoid most.

Handing Chloe a bottle of water from her bag, Ange looked sympathetically at her daughter. Sitting back down, she was relieved that she was looking considerably better.

She knew that things were far than fine though. Although her physical health had been addressed she was still incredibly concerned for her mental health.

Had she hurt herself again? What was going on in her head? Some of the things she had said over the last few hours had been incredibly concerning for Ange, she could see her daughter one again slipping into that dark place she had inhabited before.

Looking up , she saw Chloe appeared to be absorbed in her own thoughts too.

What is she thinking? Ange wondered.

Replaying the image of Evans angry face, Chloe was trying to find make some sense of where she had been. Trying to see where this memory had occurred , she tried desperately to remember- causing her headache to get worse. Putting her head in her hands, she felt a stab of pain from her chin . Cautiously prodding the area she found it to be really quite painful.

"You've got quite a bruise there." Her Mum said, seeing her touch her chin.

Ignoring her Mums comment, she found herself remembering something else from the night before. It was Evan again. They were in a different place to last time. Quieter. A park or something. She was feeling woozy and couldn't really see straight, she could feel him try to kiss her, and she pushed him away.

She felt a sharp pain and felt herself fall backwards. Her chin was hurting and Evan was stood over her, the now familiar look of fury on his face.

"Chloe? Are you ok?" Ange asked, concerned- seeing a panicked look on her daughter's face.

"Of course" Chloe replied, though this was far from the truth.

"Your breathing Chlo, just try to slow it down a bit, you're alright" Ange soothed ,noticing her start to hyperventilate and moving towards her.

"Get away from me, I don't need your help" Chloe spat, moving to the very corner of the bed, feeling the familiar sense of doom. Clawing at her top along the neckline, feeling like something was constricting around her neck , stopping her from being able to breath properly.

"Calm, Chloe. Calm." Ange said through tears. Heartbroken both at the state her daughter was in and by the fact that there was nothing she could do to help. Not wanting to make matters worse, Ange kept her distance , just saying calming, soothing things.

"In and out sweetheart, you're alright. You're safe. It will pass. You are fine." Ange soothed, tears still running down her own face.

It wasn't working though, Chloe was looking desperate now, fear in her eyes.

Desperately fighting for every breath and shaking so visibly Ange could see it from across the room. Chloe had lost total control of this now, and that in itself was starting to panic her more. Convinced she was going to die, that every breath was her last- Chloe started to make desperate , choking attempts at breathing.

Seeing her daughter look so feeble and desperate Ange couldn't stay away from her, approaching her daughter and holding her in a tight embrace, worried deeply.

"Chloe, look at me" Ange practically begged.

Putting her finger under her chin, being careful to avoid the bruise, Ange gently titled her chin so that her eyes met hers.

"Chloe, listen to me. In, and then out, nice and slow" Ange said, demonstrating her breathing.

After about the sixth time of doing this, Chloe had managed to slow down her breathing slightly. Still erratic, she had more control and over the next few minutes managed to calm down, she was more aware of herself. She could feel her Mums strong arms around her, she could feel her own heart beating rapidly in her ears and she had pins and needles in her hands.

Moving her hands to try and relieve the pins and needles, she saw they were shaking. She felt her Mum grab them and squeeze them reassuringly.

Part of her wanted to shrug her Mum off of her. She was still angry, still felt so let down and hurt by the lies, but she couldn't deny how much she wanted her Mum to hold her like this forever. Her Mum was the one constant in her life. She needed her, but her pride wouldn't let her admit this.

Evan. What had happened? Was that even a memory or just something she had made up? He wouldn't, surely? Where was he? She couldn't deny that she wasn't terrified that he might have hurt her, but she just couldn't believe he would. The way her head was at the moment, she couldn't trust anything she thought.

"I want to take you home with me Chlo" Ange said, looking at her watch. It was now 2pm,they couldn't hide away in here forever.

"I'm an adult, I can look after myself" Chloe protested.

"I know you can, but I want to look after you, I'm worried about you right now. We need to talk, we have some things we need to talk through." Ange reasoned.

"Understatement"

"What you really must remember right now is that I love you. That has not changed and it never will. You are my world and I would do anything for you." Ange said. Chloe could tell by the look in her eyes that she meant it.

Chloe just nodded.

"I've got you a change of clothes, so get yourself changed, and I will take you back with me. I've already told Jac that you are ill and will be off for a few days. I am due some holidays, and there's nothing here they can't handle without me. We need some time, just the two of us."

Chloe started getting changed as instructed. Ange tried not to look at her, but couldn't help glancing up and seeing some of the scars across her stomach. Ange knew they were there, but every time she saw them it still shocked her. At least there doesn't appear to be anything fresh, she thought.

Chloe's cheeks burned red in embarrassment as she could feel her Mum looking at her. She had not asked to be like this, she thought.

Getting changed as fast as she could, she then looked through her bag- looking for her makeup, she didn't want to be seen out like this.

Rummaging through her bag, she picked her phone up, out of habit more than anything else. She could see all of the missed calls from her Mum, as well as many more from Evan.

Seeing 34 text messages from him, she had a quick look, hoping to be able to piece of last night together.

_Are you alright?_

_I love you._

_Tell me where you are, please._

_I forgive you._

_Chloe_.

_Please_.

_I'm ok, just in A E now._

_It wasn't your fault._

_Where are you?_

Chloe couldn't believe what she was reading. What did he mean? What had she done? Needing answers she decided to go and find him ,scared that she had done something awful.

Nervously gathering her things together, she stood up.

"In will just be a minute darling" Ange said, seeing Chloe was ready to go.

"I can't do it. Sorry Mum. See you soon." Chloe said, genuinely feeling guilty for letting her Mum down.

"But Chloe wait, we need to-"

The door slammed before she could even finish what she was saying. Knowing there was no point trying to stop Chloe when she had clearly made her mind up, Ange sat in the chair and began to sob.

So near yet so far.

Please review! I really appreciate them. Thank you!


	6. Lost Chapter 6

Allowing herself to wallow in her sadness and pain for around 30 seconds, Ange suddenly had a realisation . She was Ange Goddard. She was strong, and after everything she had been through she was not going to back down.

Her daughter needed her, even if she didn't know it.

Rushing out of the room she ran to the stairwell, looking out of the window for any trace of Chloe. Seeing her hurriedly walking through the car park, she began running down the stairs as fast as she could, her hand on the handrail as otherwise she would have fallen straight down them- such was her urgency.

She could hear people talking to her but she was too focussed on getting to Chloe to register who was talking, or what they were saying. Just seeing people as irrelevant objects blocking her from reaching her daughter, she brushed past them all.

Running out of the entrance, Ange panicked. She could no longer see Chloe . She stood still for a second, looking around.

Where was she?

Just as she was about to give up on seeing her, she saw a glimpse of what might have been her bag turning around the corner and out of sight at the other end of the car park. Now out of sight, Ange had to take the risk that it maybe wasn't even her , and run across the car park- narrowly avoiding a number of cars, horns blaring behind her.

Rounding the corner, Ange could see that it was indeed Chloe, and she was heading towards the ED.

Why? Was she hurt? I thought she was alright? Ange thought to herself- panicking, what had she missed?

Watching Chloe walk through the ED doors, she followed, trying to catch up- finding it hard to see her daughter through the crowds inside the department.

She caught up to her just as she was speaking to the receptionist.

"I'm here to see Evan Crowhurst, could you please tell me where he is being treated" She asked politely, but uncomfortably.

Just as she had been told he was in cubicles, and turned to head in that direction, Ange caught her by the elbow.

"Chloe, what is going on?" she asked urgently, still out of breath, her eyes worried and inquisitive.

"What's wrong?" she demanded after receiving no response to her first question.

"It's none of your business, leave me alone!". Chloe said angrily, annoyed her Mum had followed her- making her feel smothered and frustrated.

"I'm not going anywhere. Not until I know you are alright." Ange said defiantly.

" I don't need you." Chloe said, a look of hatred passing over her face.

"Well, I need you!" Ange shouted, her frustration showing.

Realising many people were looking at them, as they argued in front of the entire waiting room- Ange didn't even care as she broke into tears. The tears quickly turned into sobs, her face a picture of anguish.

Seeing her Mum show weakness like never before, Chloe was stunned.

Stood in absolute shock, she couldn't believe what she was seeing, the one person she could always rely on to be strong appeared broken.

"Mum" Chloe said in a childlike voice.

Stepping forward to embrace her Mum, she held her tight. Her sobs ricocheted through the both of them. Chloe felt a wave of guilt. How could she have said the things she had said?

" Don't Mum" Chloe pleaded, rubbing her back comfortingly.

"I'm sorry sweetheart it's alright" Ange said, trying to keep Chloe calm, feeling much better herself after a much needed hug .

"I'm fine Mum, you don't need to worry about me." Chloe said hoping it would reassure her Mum, as angry as she might be with her- she still loved her.

"Please just tell me what's wrong. Where are you hurt?" Ange asked, looking Chloe up and down for any obvious injuries.

"I'm fine, Mum" Chloe said, almost smiling.

"Then why are you here?" Ange asked, not believing her daughter.

"Evan. I think he is hurt or something- he said he was in AE."

"What? Do you know where he is?" Ange asked, both surprised and concerned. She might have had her doubts about him, but he did seem to be looking after her daughter and for that she was grateful.

"Cubicle 3" Chloe answered, looking over in the general direction of the cubicle.

"Right." Ange said, wiping her eyes and regaining her composure.

" Can you come with me?" Chloe asked quietly, scared of what she was about to find out, and feeling more at ease around her Mum.

"Of course" Ange replied, happy to feel needed.

They walked together, and spotting cubicle 3, Chloe paused for a moment, nervously.

" Hey, I'm sure he is fine, do you know what happened?" Ange asked.

"No" was Chloe's simple response.

" Do you want me to wait outside?" Ange asked kindly, wanting to give her the required space if she needed it.

She wanted to speak with Evan, to find out what had happened the night before, but that could wait.

Momentarily.

" I guess" Chloe said with uncertainty.

"I'll be right here" Ange reassured her, rubbing her arm.

Chloe nodded before walking nervously towards the cubicle, hesitantly pulling back the curtain.

Evan was sat on the bed, filling in discharge papers. He had his hand strapped up, a black eye and split lip which had evidently required stitches.

"Hey , you" Evan said kindly with a small smile when he saw her walk in sheepishly.

"Don't be alarmed, it looks far worse than it is" he said, seeing a shocked expression on her face.

"What happened? " she asked, worried.

" You don't remember?" He asked, looking concerned.

"No. Tell me" Chloe said, still very much bothered by her lack of memory and getting frustrated.

" You hurt me Chloe, but it's not your fault. You are in a bad place at the moment and I understand" Evan said, looking her sincerely in the eye.

" What do you mean?" she asked nervously.

" You attacked me, I don't know why." Evan elaborated, remaining calm.

" I wouldn't" Chloe said, shaking her head. She was many things , but she was never violent.

" I know that it is hard to process Chloe but you did. I think that maybe everything just built up inside you and you had to let it out on me. This is why you have to talk to me. We are a team remember? I am free to go now so let's go back to mine. We can do whatever you want and talk through your feelings." Evan said smoothly.

" I will just go and tell my Mum" Chloe replied remembering she was waiting outside, and still in a state of shock from what had been said.

"What do you mean?" Where is she?" Evan questioned with a sense of urgency in his voice.

"Outside" Chloe answered simply, thinking it shouldn't be a problem.

"I thought we agreed you shouldn't see her right now. It's not good for you. Obviously I was right. So you hurt me and then ran off to your Mum. Seriously Chloe, I have done nothing but good for you- your Mum has lied to you your whole life." He snapped, unable to hide his anger.

"Sorry, Evan" Chloe answered, confused.

"You should be. I'm just trying to look after you Chloe. It is very important that you must listen to me." He said, his tone returning to its usual smooth style of talking.

"You're right. I am toxic. Everyone needs to stay away from me. Look what I did to you, after you helped me. I can't believe what I am. I, I ,I , I need to get away from everyone." Chloe stuttered, tearing up and backing away- all of her guilt returning at once.

Quickly, she turned and began running, needing to get away. Not aware of anybody around her, just her desperate need to get out of the building, which felt like it was beginning to close in around her- she ran as fast as she could, crashing into a number of people.

"Chloe, wait" Evan shouted, chastising himself, obviously he hadn't played this one correctly.

"Chlo" Ange said, trying to talk to her daughter who ran straight past her in tears.

Ange chased after Chloe, as did Evan who was just a few paces behind, but was being hampered by an apparent injury to his ribs.

Chloe began sprinting as soon as she reached the car park, heading towards the road.

Seeing immediate danger for her daughter, Ange found speed and strength she didn't know she had, launched herself forward and tackled Chloe to the ground , barely two steps away from the busy road. Cars whizzed past dangerously close and Ange tried her best to hold her daughter still, scared she could still run into the road.

"You silly girl!" she shouted, angry and scared for Chloe. She had genuinely believed she was about to lose her daughter.

"Chloe!" Evan called, concerned, catching up to the pair and seeing a cut on Chloe's head.

"What did you do that for?" He shouted at Ange furiously.

"Get off me! " Chloe yelled, pushing her Mum off of her, holding her head.

"Let me see" Ange said, trying to approach her daughter- referring to the wound on her head. Her body was still pulsing with adrenaline and unable to believe what had just happened.

She was also injured, with grazed hands and knees but felt no pain as all she cared about was her daughter.

"Get away from her! Why can't you leave her alone?" Evan shouted, bending down to examine Chloe himself.

"It's alright sweetie I will look after you" Evan soothed, stroking Chloe's hair back from her face where it had stuck to her due to the blood- his eyes kind and gentle.

Helping Chloe to stand , he batted away Ange's hand as she had also tried to help her up.

"I think you've don't enough" He spat at Ange.

"I was just trying to protect her" Ange justified, confused by Evans hostility towards her. Had he not seen her running towards the road?

"I think you should just leave us alone, don't you Chloe?" He asked, looking Chloe.

Chloe just nodded forlornly, not really in any state to talk.

She was confused. What was going on?

Who am I? She thought.

Feeling Evans arms around her, gently leading her back into the ED, familiar was the sensation she would use to best describe the feeling of being with Evan. Not particularly safe, not madly in love, but familiar.

**It really would mean a lot if you could review! Thank you.**


	7. Lost Chapter 7

Ange stood in shock, watching Evan walk Chloe towards the ED. She felt something. Hatred. In that moment she knew . She knew that Evan was up to something.

Starting to feel the pain from her grazes, she winced. Just when things couldn't get any worse, they did, she thought. It was becoming a recurrent theme in her life.

Hobbling over to a bench, she sat down and lit up a cigarette. She needed all the relief she could get right now. Hearing her phone buzz, she searched her pockets frantically, hoping it was Chloe. Maybe she had seen sense.

It was a message, not from Chloe, but Fletch.

_You looked upset earlier, everything ok?_

Reading it, she was surprised somebody had noticed, that somebody cared.

_No_

Was all she could reply. She didn't even have the energy to pretend everything was fine anymore.

Dom most likely hated her, deservingly so. He definitely would have been better off never knowing , she thought.

Chloe, well Chloe was a mess. Ange was terrified that maybe she had just tried to hurt herself again- though she didn't know if running into the road was intentional or not, or a flight response as had happened in the past.

Evan was up to something, but she couldn't tell what- and he had her precious daughter right now- she wanted him, not her.

To top it off she had just injured her own daughter- though she knew her intentions were good, seeing Chloe in pain yet again had cut her deep, and now to not be in there with her, to be sat outside imagining the very worst scenarios over and over was tortuous. Thinking over all of the emotional and now physical pain she had caused her only daughter was making her feel sick.

Thinking all of this over, she angrily smoked her cigarette , then another - her hands shaking so much she relied on her lips to steady it.

Walking through reception, Evan steered Chloe by the shoulders, blood was dripping into her eyes and so she couldn't see clearly.

" I just want to go home. Where's my Mum?" Chloe asked, her eyes almost fully closed now.

" We will get you sorted out, and I will take you back to mine. Dont worry, your Mum can't hurt you again" Evan answered.

"Charlie, you couldn't do me a massive favour could you?" Evan asked, politely, recognising the nurse and wanting to get Chloe sorted and back to his as soon as possible.

He gave Chloe a reassuring squeeze, looking every inch the worried boyfriend.

Seeing Evan, who he had seen around the hospital on a number of occasions, and the blonde woman he was holding close, protectively- he realised they were both doctors, he had spoken to them both before when they had been down for consults.

Seeing immediately that Chloe was not alright, but pale, shaken, bloody and somewhat disorientated, Charlie knew she had to be seen to as soon as possible. He was sure that she was the usually bouncy Scottish one.

"Alright, Chloe, is it?" Charlie asked- impressed he was able to recall her name .

Not receiving any response from Chloe, Charlie looked up to Evan, concerned for the young woman.

"Chloe Goddard, yes- she just had a nasty fall and hit her head. She didn't appear to lose consciousness but she seems really shaken." Evan explained, all the while looking lovingly at his girlfriend.

"I really would like to get her seen and back home as soon as possible" He added.

"Alright then Chloe, I'm Charlie- we've met before I think. I will get you sorted in no time." Charlie said, taking Chloe by the elbow and starting to walk her to an available cubicle.

"If you could just go and give her details at reception please" Charlie asked Evan, signalling that he should let go.

Not really wanting to leave Chloe alone he hesitated.

"I've got her, she will be fine." Charlie reasoned.

" Of course" Evan said, not wanting to seem overbearing,- but really not wanting to leave Chloe unsupervised. Deciding to do this as fast as possible, he gave Chloe a quick kiss and rushed off.

"I'll be right back" he said to Chloe as he was walking away.

Seeing Evan walk off towards reception, Charlie helped Chloe to get herself sat on the bed.

" Looks like you've both been in the wars!" he joked, having noticed Evans injuries also. He looked worriedly at Chloe, after receiving no response.

Gently inspecting the wound with his gloved hands, Charlie informed her comfortingly "I think a few sutures and you will be good as new, can you remind me how this happened?"

The whole situation seemed a little bizarre. As experienced as ever, Charlie had noted the cuts on Chloe's hands, a bruise peaking out from behind a layer of foundation on her chin and her odd behaviour. He knew something was not right, and for now had to ascertain whether this was a medical problem or something else.

" I fell" Chloe answered simply, hoping to get out of there as soon as possible. She wanted go to home, and sleep.

Forever.

" Did you feel dizzy or anything before that?" Charlie quizzed.

" No" Chloe answered, wondering where her Mum was.

" How about now, any nausea, dizziness, headache?" He questioned further.

"No" she said, appearing uninterested.

" Are you hurt anywhere else?" Charlie asked, knowing she was hiding something.

"No" Chloe answered, wishing he would hurry up and stitch her head. She would do it herself if she could just have a moment to herself.

" Alright then, well I will get a doctor to come and check you out , and then get you all sorted." Charlie said cheerfully, removing his gloves.

"Thank you" Chloe said, and she meant it. She was grateful for the help, she just wished she could be alone for a while.

" Are you sure nothing else is bothering you?" Charlie asked gently , unable to help himself.

" I'm just tired is all." Chloe said with a sigh and sad smile, wanting to reassure him.

" Did you feel like that before the fall?" Charlie asked, having noticed the dark bags under her eyes and pale complexion- make up didn't hide things from him, he'd been in this game long enough.

Chloe nodded, causing a wave of nausea, a look of alarm appearing on her face.

Charlie knew that expression and was

ready with a bowl in seconds. Rubbing Chloe's back comfortingly as she was repeatedly sick, Charlie knew he needed to get her checked out ASAP, and would also run some blood tests to try to determine the cause of her tiredness and fall.

"Chloe!" exclaimed Evan, seeing her vomiting as he returned to the cubicle , having provided them with Chloe's details.

"I'm just going to get a doctor now" Charlie said, seeing the concerned expression on Evans face.

As Charlie went looking for a doctor, Evan put his arm around Chloe protectively.

"Are you alright?" He asked, playing with her hair, and looking at her wound again.

"Yeah" Chloe replied, too exhausted to say anything else. It had been a very tough few days for her.

"What did you tell him?" Evan asked suddenly.

" Nothing" Chloe answered, surprised.

"I can't believe your Mum hurt you like that." Evan said, looking lovingly into her eyes.

Chloe didn't even have time to respond before they were interrupted.

"Alright then Chloe, the doctor will be along shortly- I'm just going to take some blood" Charlie said, reappearing with the necessary supplies.

"Wait, why?" asked Evan defensively.

" We just want to rule some things out" Charlie said calmly, proceeding as normal.

" Sharp scratch" he warned, but Chloe didn't even flinch.

Evan said nothing, just shuffled uncomfortably. Appearing stressed, he paced for a few moments , and said " I'm just going to get a drink, I will be back in a minute".

" Who ruffled his feathers?" Charlie asked Chloe inquisitively.

" Don't know. I don't know anything anymore." Chloe said quietly.

"What do you mean by that?" Charlie asked- his interest really peaked now.

"If I told you, you wouldn't believe me" Chloe responded, just as Dr Gardener arrived- and Charlie was unable to question her further as the doctor began her examination.

Stood by the entrance of the ED, on her 5th cigarette at this point, after waiting for close to an hour- Ange saw Evan walk out of the ED doors, heading towards one of the benches.

Reacting quickly, she stubbed out her cigarette and headed inside, avoiding being seen by him.

Walking straight through to cubicles, she saw Chloe sat on a bed, a nurse cleaning her wound and stitching it up.

Walking over towards her, Ange stood far enough away as to not startle her daughter, or the nurse- that would not be pretty while she was having stitches.

Seeing that the nurse had finished, Ange walked over.

" Chloe" she said gently, not knowing what kind of reaction she would receive.

"Mum. Are you ok?" she asked, seeing her Mum limp slightly.

" I'm fine, how is she?" she asked the nurse knowing that she would just get the answer 'fine' 'from Chloe.

" All stitched up now and we think she might have a concussion so we are just keeping an eye on her for a little while" Charlie answered, happy the young womans mother was there.

"What happened to you? He asked Ange, looking down at her grazed hands and bloodied knees.

" I fell" she dismissed.

" Must run in the family" Charlie retorted as he walked away.

"I'm so sorry sweetheart, I didn't mean to hurt you, I was scared you would run into the road" Ange said, feeling the need to explain her actions. Evans reaction had made her think she might have been in the wrong.

" I know Mum, I'm sorry. It was like some sort of panic attack or something, I just couldn't stop. I would have run into the road. Maybe it would have been better that way" Chloe said feeling guilty for all the fuss she was causing everyone.

" Don't you ever talk like that" Ange chastised her, unable to hide her distress.

"Sorry" Chloe mumbled.

"What caused it?" Ange asked kindly, trying to get to the bottom of her daughters distress.

" I was just confused. So confused. I still am." Chloe replied, which Ange understood. There was no way her daughter could not be confused. It was a mess. But she was going to help her through it.

" Are you sure you're feeling alright? Are you dizzy, any vision problems, do you-" Ange questioned worriedly before being interupted by her daughter.

" I am fine, Mum" she said with a hint of a smile.

Just as Ange hugged her daughter, Charlie walked back into the cubicle.

His usually jovial expression was replaced with one of concern.

"What's wrong?" Ange asked, terrified- recognising the bad news face instantly.

"I'm afraid I have some concerning news regarding the blood test results"

**Please review and let me know what ****you think!**


	8. Chapter 8

**Sorry for the delay in updating, had a lot going on. I hope you like it!**

"We've found traces of GHB in your system. It appears you may have been drugged" He informed her solemnly.

"What?" Ange asked furiously , terrified of what could have happened to her daughter in that state and angry that somebody could have done that.

"High levels too, so it most likely occurred last night- there is still a large amount present in your system which may explain why you have been feeling strange." He elaborated, looking at a silent Chloe.

They all remained silent for a number of seconds, each of them absorbed by their own thoughts.

"Now it's up to you where we go from here" Charlie said to Chloe calmly, breaking the silence.

"Meaning?" Ange asked, Chloe still remaining silent.

" Well it would probably be best to report this to the Police, they could be able to track your movements, and find who did this to you, Chloe. Chloe?" He asked, getting increasingly concerned about her silence and lack of reaction.

"Of course we will go to the Police." Ange said as though it was the most obvious thing ever.

Just at that moment, Evan walked back into the cubicles.

"Police?" He asked, with mock confusion, visibly irritated to see Ange looking closer to Chloe.

"This is a private matter" Ange replied, glaring at him. She didn't want to bring the subject up just yet , until Chloe had had time to absorb the information-but she felt like he could be involved in this and didn't want him anywhere near her daughter.

"Chloe what's going on?" He asked kindly , blanking Ange.

Chloe didn't answer , just stared straight ahead. As though he wasn't there. As though none of them were.

Her head felt fuzzy, she couldn't hear exactly what was being said, just her heartbeat pounding in her head.

She was unable to comprehend what she had just been told, not able to put thoughts together in her head.

"She's clearly in shock, I will take her home- I think she needs to be in familiar surroundings." Evan said to Charlie.

"Are you crazy?" Ange spat furiously.

"If you could get the paperwork please." Evan said to Charlie, dismissing Ange.

" Actually it is up to Chloe to decide what happens next" Charlie said, getting a bad feeling about Evan.

"You want to go home with me don't you? So I can protect you, so your Mum can't hurt you anymore." Evan said, stroking her hair, glare directly on Ange.

"I don't want you anywhere near my daughter" Ange snapped, pushing his hand away from Chloe's hair, devastated that he was trying to tear them apart and terrified it might work.

" I am the only one she can trust, isn't that right Chloe?" He asked, a hint of a smug smile playing on his lips.

"Who knows what you have been doing to her!" Ange shouted.

" You think I drugged her? Wow you are more deluded than I thought!" he countered.

"Who said anything about drugging?" Charlie asked, seriously.

" Erm, well obviously it must have happened if you want to go to the Police." He replied, looking slightly uncomfortable but still confident.

Both Charlie and Ange eyed him suspiciously.

" I think its time we all stepped back and left Chloe to think about this" Charlie said, noticing that Chloe was beginning to breath quickly and look panicked - everyone else was too involved in the situation to see the impact it was having on her.

They both went to argue but Charlie ushered them out of the cubicle nonetheless.

"I don't want you anywhere near her" Ange said to Evan, her face inches away from his once they were out of hearing range of Chloe.

"After everything you've done to her, and you think I'm the one she needs to stay away from?" Evan shouted back angrily.

" You two need to calm down right now. This is not helping her at all. Can you not see that?" Charlie said , letting his own frustration show.

"You clearly can't be civil so you go to reception, Evan - and you go to the relatives room. Now. I will come and update you when I know something." He said with authority.

Ange looked worriedly at Charlie , tears in her eyes - but did as he had said and slowly walked towards the relatives room, not even glancing at Evan as she couldn't trust herself not to hit him. She just wanted to help her daughter but didn't know how best to do that right now.

"Right, now she has gone, we can sort this reasonably." Evan said, smiling manipulatively at the experienced nurse.

" Can you go to reception please." Charlie ordered firmly, not falling for his tricks.

Looking at Charlie with a look of fury, he stormed off towards the reception.

Charlie shook his head as he headed back towards Chloe.

"Chloe , you are fine, just breath, that's it, good girl" Charlie soothed upon returning to the cubicle and closing the curtain. Knowing a panic attack straight away, he knew he had to try and calm her down.

"You're having a panic attack, have you had one before?" He asked, calmly.

Chloe just nodded, a frightened look in her eyes, as she clearly tried to fight off the attack.

"Then you know that this will pass, that you will be fine" he soothed.

Helping a clearly exhausted Chloe to copy his calm breathing patterns he found that she responded well and soon got herself back under control.

Seeing she was recovering, Charlie sat down on the bed.

"Well, you've clearly had a lot to take in, do you want to talk about it? He asked kindly, wanting to find out what was driving this family apart, and what Evan was up to.

Chloe just shook her head sadly.

"Family problems?" He questioned.

" You wouldn't believe if I told you" she said quietly.

"That bad ey?" He enquired with a chuckle.

Chloe just nodded.

Her head was all over the place. Facts , fiction, lies, truth - all whirling round in her head and blending into utter chaos. It was all going round her head so fast she started to get a feeling close to that of motion sickness.

Seeing the look of panic on Chloe's face again, her hand darting to her mouth, Charlie presented a bowl in record time- and held her hair back as she vomited repeatedly.

"Any dizziness, blurred vision, headaches?" He asked when she had finished.

" Bit of a headache." She mumbled.

" I need to get the doctor to have another look at you, because I'm a bit worried about your head injury, is that alright?" Charlie asked, and Chloe just nodded.

"Try and get some rest I'll be back in a minute." He told her.

Charlie stepped back out to inform Dr Gardener of the update on her condition.

Closing the curtains he saw a lost and broken woman sat on the bed and resolved to help her as much as he could.

Looking for Elle, he wandered into the reception area looking for her.

Seeing her coming down the stairs from the pharmacy , he headed towards her.

Out of the corner of his eye he could see somebody pacing with purpose and soon realised it was Evan and he was heading towards him.

"Hey what is going on , is she alright?" Evan asked, his disdain for the nurse palpable despite his best efforts to hide it.

"I'll let you know if there are any developments." Charlie answered calmly, still walking towards Elle.

"No, you'll tell me now." Evan ordered.

" Excuse me?" Charlie asked, offended.

" I'm a doctor you're just a nurse. I'm taking her home now- you are clearly incapable." Evan dismissed.

"Step away now or I will have you removed by security." Charlie replied, looking towards the security guards.

Evan just glared furiously at Charlie, clenching his jaw visibly.

"That's him! That's him!" A patient screamed as he was being wheeled into the ED, covered in blood and with his arm in a sling.

It was being shouted so loud that it gained everybody's attention- including that of Evan and Charlie.

Looking over at the vocal patient , Charlie realised that he was pointing at Evan. The terror in his eyes was real and in that moment he knew that Evan had had something to do with his injuries.

Evan, clearly recognising the man started to run out of the ED, crashing into people but offering no apology.

Charlie briefly contemplated running after the young man, it had been a long time since he had hated someone as much as he now did Evan, he had clearly been up to no good- but he wasn't as young as he used to be and needed to focus on his patient.

"Stop him!" Charlie shouted to security- pointing at Evan who had just run through the ED doors.

"Charlie?" Elle asked, confused by the chaos she had just witnessed.

"No time to explain, Chloe Goddard has been vomiting and has complained of a mild headache. She doesn't seem right, I'm worried about her." He informed her.

"Right, can you book her in for a CT please I will go and check on her." She said, touched by Charlie's apparent care for the young woman.

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	9. Chapter 9

" Ange?" Charlie asked, opening the door to the relatives room and finding a distraught looking mother sat huddled on the sofa , holding her arms close to her body for comfort.

" Is she alright?" Ange questioned quickly, startled - as she had been too absorbed in her own thoughts to hear anyone come in.

" She will be going for a CT shortly" Charlie informed her calmly, sitting down next to her, his kind eyes meeting hers.

"A CT?" Ange asked, worriedly- noticeably sitting uptight- her body tense . She could almost feel the adrenaline pumping around her body.

" She has been vomiting and complaining of a headache, it could well be related to the drink and drugs still being in her system but we want be cautious". He reassured her.

"Thank you" Ange said quietly, still terrified of Chloe being unwell.

"I think we need to talk about Evan." Charlie said, changing the subject to the elephant in the room.

The look of disgust on Ange's face told Charlie more than words ever could. He knew himself that the worst thing you could do to somebody was to hurt their child.

"What of him?" She asked with disdain.

" He's gone. Ran out of here. Looks like he may have been involved in some sort of assault or something last night." Charlie elaborated.

"What?" She asked, shocked.

"I don't know the details but I'm worried he may have been manipulating Chloe. There is something off about him." Charlie said, concern etched on his face.

" I know, and I just drove her closer towards him with everything that has happened." Ange said, putting her head in her hands with regret and despair.

"Life is complicated. Things have a way of figuring themselves out though so keep going. You will get through this." Charlie soothed calmly.

" Do you think Evan had something to do with the drugs in her system? She doesn't even know what happened last night. Oh my god. I just don't trust him at all." Ange fretted. Thinking multiple versions of the worst case scenarios she could think of, she was close to tears.

"There is no need to worry about that now, you just need to focus on getting you two back on track." Charlie said kindly- agreeing somewhat with her suspicions but knowing that they could wait.

"Yes, of course" Ange said with a sigh.

" Does she know Evan has taken off?" She asked after a moment of silent reflection .

"No, she already seemed distressed so I don't want to add to that." Charlie answered her.

" I agree. Thank you." Ange thanked, genuinely thankful that somebody else was clearly looking out for her daughter.

" Come on, let's go and see her." He said, standing up and opening the door.

Ange tentatively followed , eager to see her daughter but worried as she seemed to be doing everything wrong at the moment.

Sensing her reluctance, Charlie looked at her sympathetically.

" She needs her Mum." He soothed.

Ange nodded, and walked with purpose towards Chloe, a slight limp visible due to her scratched knees.

Ange heard Chloe before she saw her, she could hear vomiting coming from her cubicle.

Pulling back the curtains Ange saw a very weak Chloe - now laid on the bed, leaning over and vomiting into a bowl held by Dr Gardener.

"Chlo" Ange exclaimed, going over to her immediately , wiping her sticky hair back from her sweaty face.

Too tired even to reply Chloe laid back, allowing her Mum to play with her hair soothingly, seeming even to move closer towards her mother's touch.

" Can we get a drip set up please Charlie" Elle asked, clearly concerned for her patient and her rapidly worsening symptoms.

"We'll get you something to help with the nausea too" she told Chloe, patting her leg reassuringly.

"I'm just going to put a rush on that CT" Elle said to Charlie quietly, not wanting to alarm her patient or concerned mother.

The comment did not go unnoticed however and Ange glanced nervously over at the doctor, her deep worry visible in her eyes. Not wanting to worry Chloe, she kept stroking her hair and held her hand, murmuring soothing words.

She continued to do this while Charlie set up the drip, kissing her forehead when she winced in pain.

Chloe slowly and painfully pushed herself on to her side, feeling as though she may be sick again.

At this point she was more acting on instinct than anything else, she was now at the point of exhaustion where she could barely even keep her eyes open.

Noticing what Chloe was trying to do, Ange helped her move slightly and got a bowl ready - nodding at Charlie and Elle as they left the cubicle , as if to say she was in control of the situation.

" Are you going to be sick?" She asked though she felt she knew the answer already.

Before she even got a response from Chloe she started fetching painfully, with barely anything left to bring up.

Almost too weak to keep herself on her side, Ange had to hold her there with one hand, carefully balancing the bowl in the other hand.

Wincing at every retch Ange carried on trying to sooth her daughter, wiping away the tears falling from her eyes from the pain.

" It's ok baby I'm here shhhh" she whispered to her daughter, trying to remain calm but worried about the state she was in- her eyes were half closed and she looked paler than ever.

Ange gently wiped Chloe's mouth with a tissue, with Chloe in no state to do it herself.

Chloe at this point was struggling to asertain what was reality and what wasn't- she could feel her Mum holding her, and she felt safe, comfortable- more at peace than she had done in a while- her mind not able to overthink and undermine.

"Mum." Was all she could say before she could no longer keep her eyes open and fell unconscious her head lolling backwards.

"Chloe. Chloe." Ange practically begged, seeing her eyes close and her body go limp.

"Chloe." She said again, gently shaking her daughter.

Receiving no response she frantically drew the curtain back , panic stricken.

"Can I have some help in here please!" She shouted.

Both Dr Gardener and Charlie looked up, they had only gone a few steps – and had been stood discussing their patient.

Seeing the terror in Ange's eyes they quickly yet calmly walked towards the cubicle.

"Chloe, can you hear me? Squeeze my hand if you can hear me." Elle said, taking you young woman's hand into her own, talking loudly and clearly.

" Can we get her on O2 please." Elle said, laying the bed down flat, after receiving no response from the young wom,an and establishing that this was not simply a vasovagal episode.

Ange watched on in horror as they started fussing around Chloe, Elle checking her pupils, whilst Charlie started hooking her up to machines.

"Right, straight to CT please." Elle said urgently, taking the brakes off of the trolley.

Ange followed behind ; panic clearly etched on her face, her hands shaking.

What was wrong with Chloe?

Was It serious?

Had she caused this?

**Please review**!


	10. Chapter 10

**Hi , sorry for the slow update- had a lot going on. Here you are!**

Waiting in the relatives room, Ange felt like time had deliberately slowed down to taunt her- the echoing of the ticking clock all she could hear.

Feeling deeply anxious, she was struggling to keep her breathing even, wringing her hands together anxiously – wishing away the minutes. Briefly wondering if this was how Chloe felt when she was anxious , she felt deep compassion.

This was horrible. It had been 20 minutes since Chloe had been rushed to CT and she had been sat here, feeling useless and terrified in equal measure ever since.

Focusing on her breathing, trying to stay calm and composed for her daughters sake- she fought not to think. The events of the last few weeks were beyond comprehension.

She could not believe everything that had happened, how badly she had handled it. Instead she just had to concentrate on Chloe. The immediate focus was getting her fit and healthy.

Telling herself she was going to be fine- that she'd had a very rough few days and this illness was her body getting Chloe to rest- over and over almost like a mantra- she tried to calm her mind.

However much she told herself this, she still had an overwhelming worry that there was something more sinister going on. Dizziness, vomiting, a worsening headache- all red flags of a serious head injury and all experienced by Chloe, after she suffered the head injury that was undoubtedly her fault. Her own Mother.

Thinking of the thud her head had made when it bounced on the pavement caused her to shudder and feel nauseous.

She should have fought harder, should have taken her to CT herself immediately, should have insisted on it. Knowing she was being stupid and irrational, but still not able to stop the thoughts, her shaking hands reached into her pocket to get her phone, wanting to check the time- her mind not able to believe the clock in the room. 30 minutes had passed now, though it felt like 5 hours.

Looking down at her phone, her breath caught in her throat. It was cracked. That was irrelevant. Must have happened when she tackled Chloe. She looked at her screensaver, her beautiful daughter- happy and smiling. Now with cracks running down the picture, distorting and ruining the image- Ange broke down, her phone dropping out of her hands and hitting the carpet with a gentle thud, bouncing once before resting face down on the floor.

Her head in her hands now, she sobbed desperately , coughing and retching through the effort.

Hearing a gentle knock at the door, she looked up, squinted through the tears and saw a familiar figure enter the room.

"Fletch" she said , continuing to sob.

"Hey" he said, gently sitting down next to her.

Seeing she was struggling to talk, Fletch looked at her compassionately.

"You don't have to say a word, Charlie filled me in on a few details- you don't have to talk, I just don't want you to be alone" he soothed.

Ange, touched by his kindness, sobbed louder and harder and allowed his strong arms to pull her into a hug.

Feeling her warm tears soaking into his shirt, and her body being rocked by sobs- Fletch hoped desperately the news would be good for Chloe. He knew the pain of being worried about a child and there was nothing as scary.

Still sobbing quietly, Ange allowed the sound of Fletch's heartbeat to sooth her, and exhausted - she could no longer cry, instead just staring at the floor, sniffling gently.

After a few more agonisingly slow minutes had passed, Charlie and Elle walked into the room.

"Oh my god why are you both here? What has happened? Take me to her now!" Ange practically screamed, sitting up and trying to break free from Fletch but not succeeding as he kept his arms around her.

" Ange, don't panic- Chloe is stable." Charlie comforted.

" Tell me everything" Ange said, leaning forward towards them, eager to know what the scan had revealed. She needed to know every little detail to feed the questions in her mind.

"The scan revealed that there is some swelling and bruising" Elle said calmly and deliberately slowly, needing to get the facts across but knowing that this was not the news Ange would want to hear.

Ange gasped, panicking, her heartbeat racing in her ears.

"Neuro have had a look and have said that we need to watch and wait. At this stage there is no need to operate , and they are going to monitor the pressure build up carefully. However you do need to know that she did have a seizure on the way back from CT, which is obviously concerning." She continued slowly.

"What?" Ange asked abruptly- the last piece of information terrifying her even further.

"It was very brief, and she came out of it on her own. It was less than 30 seconds." Elle explained.

"The Neuro consultant was there when it occurred, and they were satisfied that it is normal with this kind of injury and what they would expect." She added.

"Where is she?" Ange asked, overwhelmed and just wanting to see her daughter.

"She is in Resus just now, we are waiting for a high dependency Neuro bed to come up, we should be able to get her up there in the next 20 minutes or so." Charlie said.

"This is all my fault" Ange said quietly, the enormity of the situation dawning on her again.

"From what I understand Ange, you saved her from being hit by a car- it was seen on CCTV , when Security watched back footage of Evan for the Police." Charlie assured her, pleased he now knew a little more about what was going on.

" Also it could easily have been caused by the blow to her chin that she had already received. You know yourself that the mechanism of injury from an uppercut sort of blow is especially dangerous ." Elle comforted- not wanting to see the woman in front of her suffer unnecessarily.

" I should have seen it. I should have noticed." Ange continued solemnly.

" She needs you to be strong for her right now, you can't be thinking like that" Fletch reassured her.

"Obviously the Police are very eager to get more details about all of this, but they are going to wait until Chloe is conscious and everybody is feeling more up to it." Charlie informed her, having spoken to the Police himself.

"Can I see her?" Ange just needed to see Chloe now.

"Yes. She isn't conscious just yet but you do need to be aware that she is under some light sedation so will be drowsy when she comes around. If she appears to deteriorate or has another seizure then we will need to put her into an induced coma, to help her brain to rest and heal.

We need to prepare for this being likely to happen . If this happens then the likelihood is that she will need surgery to release the pressure. Obviously this is a serious situation, but she is in the best hands, and she stands a very good chance of coming through this." Elle told Ange, wanting to prepare her.

"Ok, I just want to see her." Ange said, not able to take any more information in now.

"Ok, you can go and see her for a few minutes before we send her up." Charlie said , with a kind expression.

"Come on, I will take you." Fletch offered, gently helping her up by her arm.

Walking through the Resus doors Ange was horrified to see Chloe, looking pale and motionless on the bed, an oxygen mask covering much of her face.

Feeling Fletch's strong arms supporting her, as though he was scared she was going to fall down, she went over to Chloe and held her hand tightly. Hearing somebody bring her a chair over she sat down gratefully.

"Can you explain to her?" Ange asked Fletch after a few moments of silence- worried her daughter might be scared but not composed enough to explain everything herself.

Fletch began repeating everything that they had been told, telling her that she was going to be fine, not be scared and try relax to let her body heal.

'Thanks" Ange said quietly, stroking her daughters hair.

" I'm here Chlo, everything is going to be fine. We are going to get you better and I'm going to take you home with me for little while, until we get you back on your feet." Ange soothed softly into Chloe's ear.

Ange heard the doors behind her open and somebody walk in.

"Jac?" Fletch said, surprised to see her there.

"I heard she was being admitted. How is she?" She asked, looking at her Registrar- her face not giving away whatever emotion she was feeling.

Fletch yet again had to relay the information they had been given on her condition.

" Right, I want to see her scans" She said authoritatively.

"They know what they are doing Jac." Fletch said, trying to ensure Ange didn't get worked up again.

" I know, but I can hardly expect present company to be objective, and I just want the best for her- if that means I have to hound Neuro then that is what I will do. I want her back at work ASAP. I can't handle another newbie." She added, not wanting to seem as though she cared too much.

Having looked at the scans herself and chastised Neuro over the phone for not having a bed available yet, she felt satisfied that the situation was being handled properly.

" Right, I had better get back upstairs, I have a ward to run. Let me know if anything changes" Jac stated, looking at Chloe with what appeared to be concern, and her mother with sympathy.

Just as Jac left, the doors still swinging behind her- Ange felt a squeeze on her hand.

"Chloe!" she said , seeing her daughter's eyes flickering.

A slight groan escaped Chloe's lips.

"It's alright sweetheart, you just rest." Ange said, happy to see her daughter was responding, squeezing her hand tightly and staring at her lovingly.

**Please let me know what you think.****Thank you for reading! **


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